For the guy who's got everything except a mountain of women. Put on the FriendFinder3000 and watch the ladies pour in. WARNING: FriendFinder3000 is not a toy and once activated sex is almost always unavoidable.Key:
A: High quality titanium helmet offering unparalleled support and comfort for the guy on the go. Breathing vents keep head cool even in the hottest of night clubs.
B: Industrial strength pointing arrow expertly indicates who has the big penis. Guaranteed not to point at anyone besides the wearer or your money back.
C: Commercial grade billboard featuring the words "BIG PENIS" displayed in flashing yellow lights. Flash rate can be set to either FAST, MEGA FAST, or SEIZURE. An optional brightness upgrade can be added to flood even the darkest corner of the room with migraine-inducing light.
D: Steel-reinforced counterweights give the FriendFinder3000 perfect balance even while breakdancing.
E: Rechargable Lithium-Ion battery that'll keep the FriendFinder3000 up and running at all hours of the night. No need to ever turn it off! Ever!
SMALL PRINT: FriendFinder Inc. is not responsible for any bodily harm or mental anguish stemming from inconsistencies between the FriendFinder3000 billboard message and actual penis size.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment